Boozed Up Brannigan

The trio set out again for Matthew's kingdom, where a chancellorship awaited Brian. Their new riches had proven plenty for the all the trip's supplies, with enough left over for the Alberts, Al and Bert, to acquire healthy reservoirs of their favorite traveling staples: grog and mead, respectively. At sundown, when the group had made camp, and Brian was already slumbering in the crook of a nearby tree, the Alberts filled their mugs eagerly and settled by the campfire to muse over the intricacies of their lives.

"Ah, grog," said Al.

"Ah, mead," said Bert.

"Yes, yes, mead. Also fine. If you go for that sort of thing."

Bert glared sidelong at Al across the campfire. "This, again? For once, let us not quarrel over these divisive absolutes. Rather, let us say, each of us loves his own drink, with incomparable fervor. Forsooth! I love mead as much as a man can love a drink, which is to say, immeasurably."

"Very well. I am quite devoted to grog. Verily--and though I cannot fairly compare the relative worth of our brews themselves--I'd have to say I have far more devotion for mine, than you for your putrid concoction. Fivesooth! At least."

Behind them, Brian groaned in his sleep, and shifted uneasily, but didn't wake.

The Alberts formulated an experiment. They would trade drinks, and see which of them became saddened more grievously as a result. Since this was a matter of the most heartfelt passion, and so spurious as some problem in logic, their responses would be impossible to falsify. Al and Bert both hesitated, however, to give up entirely the rewards they had so hard won.

They settled on a variation. Al transferred a spoonful of his grog into Bert's mug, and used the spoon to mix it thoroughly. They knew that this created a perfectly uniform mix, as the alcoholic sciences were the most advanced of their time, and even laymen were well versed in them. Bert then took the same spoon, transferred a spoonful from his mug into Al's, and mixed it likewise. They now retained most of their favorite brews, but with a spoonful of the other added, so there would be some observable discomfort in the dilution. They were about to drink when Al shouted out.

"Wait! This isn't fair. We should have transferred a spoonful at the same time! The spoonful you gave me was diluted, so it's going to make me suffer less than you. It'll seem like I don't mind this horrid skimming of my dear, dear grog." With neither wanting to waste any further drink, and no other spoon available besides, the two were about to revert to their original plan--seeing who would still feel like drinking after a severe beating--when Brian, wakened by the argument and now standing right behind them, intervened.

"Fellows. Please. There's nothing wrong with your experiment, it's perfectly fair. Just get on with it. Or get on with the beatings, quietly. I'm going back to bed."

Is Brian right, that the experiment is fair?

Solution